All?

For a long time I have struggled with the concept of "all".  It is an absolute that, I suspect, terrifies me, and it shows up in in some major ways. We are told that the first and great commandment is to love the Lord with all your heart, all your mind and all your soul (Matt 22:37).  I realize that I have yet to get to any one of those three, much less all of them. 

I suspect the question that I have relates to understanding if this is a commandment, a required way of living, or an illustration of the type of way we are to live.  In the extreme, to love the Lord with all of me requires me to not think or care about anyone else.  Even with the caveat that Jesus follows this with, "And the second is like it..." (Matt 22:38) that still leaves no time or no ability or no space to do or think or be anything but absolutely and totally devoted to God all the time in all circumstances.  We should all then becomes monks, devoting our lives to worship and praise of the King of Kings.  Yet, that then leads to questions about how much thought and energy am I allowed to expend in the world working, eating, playing, loving? I don't believe this is a literal call to monastery, even if there are a few are called that way. 

Another aspect is the fiscal.  I have wondered about this quite a bit, at the number of Christ followers who live in big houses, drive fine cars, take great vacations.  Should we instead be giving all of that away to the poor?  If the moderate position says we can have some material possessions, then how much house is acceptable?  500 sq ft?  1000 sq ft? 3500?  If I fail to give everything away to the poor, does that diminish me in some form to Christ and His kingdom?

The absolute nature of "all" echoes as well in Luke 14:26 where Christ says "“If anyone comes to me and does not hate father and mother, wife and children, brothers and sisters—yes, even their own life—such a person cannot be my disciple."  That would, I think, lead to very small families, very few disciples, and a very short lived religion.

I think the reason these examples bother me is two fold.  First, they represent, to me, verses that are so clearly illustrative and not declarative.  I've struggled with some of Francis Chan in "Crazy Love" and "Multiply" (in two different Bible study groups) because he talks about reading the Bible literally.....and I just can't see that.  Yes, some should clearly be taken literally, but which parts should be is not perfectly clear or straightforward.  My hope is that my objection is not just because I am sinful and want to avoid God, but because I am tired of people misusing His Word to further shame or direct or marginalize people by those techniques.  I WANT to love the Lord far more than I do, but don't know how to do it.  These statements as declarative don't bring me closer, they drive me further away.  To pull from "one Way Love" by Tullian Tchividjian, legalism doesn't inspire people to do better, it causes them to give up.  And I don't want to give up.

Second, I have found that my connection with God improves when the decision of how much and when and how are made by me through the prompting of His Spirit.  I know that people telling me to give hasn't made me want to give, it was the demonstration of generosity by others that did.  It was not a command to read the Bible that caused me to, but the realization that I wanted to know Him better, or to track through a verse that causes me to question or to see things differently. 

I don't think I will get to "all" on this side of life.  What I want on this side is to be moving in that direction, freely, because I hear Him calling me.  Lord, please let me hear You better, to be stirred by Your Spirit, to move closer to You as I continue to live life here.  Amen.